yearEND

At work and I'm soo bored! I'm going to Sam's tonight don't know what we're doing. This sucks but that's all I've got.

XXXmas

I feel like my life is completely different. My paents trust, I'm in a great relationship, work/school is going as well is it can be. Truth be told I don't know what to make of all this. For once everything is going well however I'm truthfully not as happy as I should be. I feel as though I'm wasting my youth. I know thats soo lame but it's true! When I was living in New Orleans I was on my own and it was amazing, I was always on some sort of adventure, but now I feel as though I'm over scheduled...legit. Everything I have should be making me happy but it's not, well not completely, I'm wholey and truly in love with Sam, I can't imagine living without him, and my parents trust me know and i've had this job for sooo long now. However, I can't help but think I'm missing something. I don't feel cute anymore or desireable but besides that I"m just plain BORED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

from first to last

Note to self: research "selective perception"
...
that is all

(almost)decemberunderground

So it's been a while sorry about that whoever follows this. Texas was a really great time although it almost didn't even start. Meredith kind of through a monkey wrench into the trip by getting drunk and missing her flight but in the end we had a great time. Seeing Shep was amazing and she looked beautiful. All in the all the trip was great even though the hotel staff wouldn't let a drunken me go swinning at midnight(their loss).
Things back in Baltimore are going great. Work and school are both going swimmingly. Sam and I will be officially together for a month on the 25th and I have nothing to complain about whatsoever. He really is amazing and I'm thankful everyday for our relationship. His birthday was the 21st and we had dinner with his sister and his parents and had a great time. They were really nice and liked me which is a small blessing. I honestly cannot rave enough about him and I know I sound redundant a lot of the time but we really fit each other perfectly. Thanksgiving is this week so I'm counting on spending a lot of quality time with Lindsay and everyone else!
Happy holidays!!!

ps: you're a ten when you're lying next to me.

XOXO

...really happy right now!

saturday

So I was supposed to go out with Sam tonight but he's sick, so we rescheduled for next week. I smoked myself stupid last night but I've also just started work on a screenplay! It's going to be a hilarious teen sex romp. Shower time!

show & tell

been a while

So the entire purpose of this blog was to actually update it regularly which I've kind of sucked at lately...sorry. So school is going alright, everything is pretty easy I'm mostly just bored in class just like at work. However, there is an interesting development. I had a date last week! So I met this guy Sam at school he's really chill and we hit it off right away. We're going out tomorrow night to smoke a blunt and see "Nick and Norah's Infinite Playlist" which I'm totally stoked for. I haven't met someone I've really liked since Branden and we all know how that ended. I've been missing a ton of people lately, well that's a lie really just a few specific people. Shep's wedding is less than a month away and I still don't have a suit. I'm kind of in that first couple dates glow right now. I don't want to get too into it too soon and scare him off. To be honest I feel so completely alone sometimes that I don't know what to do. I'm not complaining because I generally like being alone but it would be nice to have someone speciall for myself.

PS: I told Sterling I met someone, he told me to go to hell and to never speak to him again...all I could do was laugh and I don't know why...okay I totally know why but still.

...awkward!

So I had a somewhat awkward encounter this morning following 18th century british literature. After class I was walking out the doors of Linthicum towards the parking garage when lo and behold who should be taking up half the smokers bench but none other than my ex Branden's best friend Sarah. I should probably mention that Sarah is a morbidly obese lesbian, no joke just an observation. Naturally I swung my bangs into my face and kept on walking but it was still unpleasant none the less. I guess it wasn't that bad but there is a lot of ill will between myself and them. Branden is just...I don't even know. He's dating some little kid from Jersey and I'd be lying if I said I wasn't a little bit jealous since I myself for all intents and purposes am single. In the end though I'm really not because everything else in my life is going so splendidly. Although I do currently have a long distance crush on someone...At the moment I'm in my house having had a delicious dinner of shrimp etouffee followd by a bourbon and ginger ale and I'm watching "Something's Gotta Give" one of my favorite movies. Sweet dreams...

k hole

I prayed tonight for the first time in I don't even know how long. I don't think I can live with my parents for much longer. Not to be self indulgent but I'm really depressed right now. And alone. At least I can look forward to going to a school I hate with people I couldn't care less about.

Tokyo a go-go!!!

So school has started and so far it's not that bad. I'm really enjoying my nonwestern art class although it is at 8:00 am which is quickly becoming a good thing as parking is so much eashier that early in the morning. Work is super lame lately mostly because having to work with Dawn everyday is not that much fun. I really don't even consider us friends anymore, which is fine I mean we just aren't compatible.
Onto some more interesting things, since I won't be graduating until 2010 I've decided that next summer I want to go on an amazing adventure. I'm talking Tokyo baby! It's going to cost at least $1,700 just to fly there so I'm hoping I can work something out with my parents where they pay half and I pay the other half based on my grades. I'm actually really excited about the prospect of this. I would like to stay in Tokyo for one week and just take pictures and get into trouble. Also, I'm officially looking for that special someone.

@ work

So I'm at work and thought I'd take a NY minute to post something. Dawn faked a pregnancy as a joke but the joke was on her when Ben decided that he had had enough of her hijinks and dumped her. I tried to feign sympathy for as long as I could but it became quite taxing. She doesn't realize that breaking up with him is a blessing, c'est la vie. First day of school later.

prelude to labor day

So this weekend was great. Friday night I went out with Jack and Ross for drinks and randomly Bryan and Yvonne rolled up so we all hung out together and then Lyn showed up. Had a great night being together with all of my best friends. Saturday I went to the mall with Lindsay and she got her hair cut quite short, she's unsure but it looks totally cute. Saturday Jack came over and we all watched a documentary on real life vampires and smoked some herb. I'm in bum mode right now but unfortunately class starts on Tuesday...gay.

"Oh, you're different from the former"

Class starts next Tuesday, not especially looking forward to it but Towson is so easy that it shouldn't be a problem as opposed to Loyola where the work was actually challenging. I'm getting tired of pretending to care about Sterling, but, it's still nice to have someone I guess. I'm having drinks with Lindsay and Ross tomorrow night which I am quite jazzed about.

Kelsey's going away crab dinner/party was tonight, I had an okay time but the only thing I was looking forward to, smoking copious blunts with immediate family members, fell through. My mom got lost on the way home, it was worrisome. Tomorrow I have to buy books which I'm dreading as the bookstore always gives me anxiety.

Bon Soir

PS: I love pandas.